“Cristina, can you represent the biggest wound my mother left me?” That's what the chat looked like in the live about the mother wound. And the answer came differently every time: lack of self-confidence, the need for validation, “I'm worth nothing”, a hunger for love. They all had the same source: the first relationship in your life. The psychological unbindings on the mother came to me through guidance; I tested them on myself first and then put them into a book: Complete Unbindings with Mother – The Relationship with Your Mother, in PDF format.
Maybe you recognize yourself: you're always waiting for someone to encourage you, you have an inner critic that won't be quiet, you live on alert and want to control everything. Or you were the child who had to be strong for everyone. There's nothing wrong with you. It's a wound, and wounds can be worked on.
And I want to be clear from the start: the book is not against mothers. Our mothers, in turn, had wounded mothers. Unbinding isn't revenge, but a giving back: you give your mother what is hers and keep what is yours.
I want the Unbindings with Mother PDF book →
What you'll find in the book for healing the mother wound
The book is dedicated to the relationship with the maternal figure: emotional safety, attachment, trust and the way you build relationships. You work through unbindings and personal reflection.
What you'll find in it:
- over 100 pages of unbindings;
- work on rejection, control and lack of affection;
- an exploration of the wounds and tensions linked to your relationship with your mother;
- formulas for spiritual work and introspection;
- maternal patterns that can repeat in adult life.
The method is simple: you center yourself, say the phrase and push the energy out. At the phrases where you have reactions, you come back and work several times. I always start with safety, with the state of alert and the need for control, because that's where the foundation is.
You receive it as a digital PDF, on WhatsApp, in Romanian or in 12 other languages (English, French, German, Italian, Spanish, Russian, Japanese, Arabic, Portuguese, Turkish, Hindi and Chinese).
Who the book is for
It's for you if:
- you have a constant need for validation and wait for encouragement from outside;
- you have a harsh inner critic and a perfectionism that wears you out;
- you live in a state of alert, always anticipating what bad thing might happen;
- you were the child who grew up too early, the family's savior;
- you feel a hunger for love that no partner can fill;
- you still hear “be quiet”, “you're stupid” or “life is hard” inside you today.
From what I've seen in people, the vast majority of adult problems have roots in the relationship with the mother, even if the father was the toxic one. I wrote at length about the signs and the ritual in the complete article on the mother wound and unbindings with your mother.
If you have experienced abuse or severe trauma, also work with a psychologist or psychotherapist. Unbindings don't replace therapy, and if you are in danger, call 112 or your local emergency number.
How to work with it
- Stand on dry salt. About a kilogram of coarse salt on the floor, your bare soles on it. Not in salt water: there it gets diluted.
- Close your eyes and come into your body. If you don't feel anything, maybe you're too much in your mind. Come gently into your body.
- Speak slowly and push the energy out. “Dear mother, I give you back everything that is yours and I let everything that is not me drain out of my body.” You're not reciting poetry.
- Take back what is yours. “Dear mother, I take back everything that is mine.” Self-confidence, self-love, your childhood.
- Let the emotions come out. Burping, yawning, itching, crying, even anger. Anger is a stage of healing.
- Give thanks at the end. Those energies helped you survive.
You can do the unbindings even if your mother is no longer with us. You do her no harm by giving her what is hers.
I'll take the PDF + Musk essential oil →
The lives that prepare you
Unbindings with mother, from my book – part 1
I worked live from the book. It's the best way to see what the phrases look like and how to go through a chapter.
The biggest wound left by your mother
The live with representations, in which we searched together for the biggest wound from the mother: lack of trust, validation, “I'm worth nothing”.
Energy cleansings on salt from your mother's energies
The salt ritual, step by step: you give back the criticism, the conditional love, the invisible limits, then you call back the pieces of your soul.
Which option to choose
- Complete Unbindings with Mother (PDF) – €25. The workbook.
- Complete Unbindings with Mother (PDF) + MUSK essential oil – €50. The book plus musk oil, which I also use myself on salt.
- Complete Unbindings on Mother and Father (2 PDFs) – €40. The mother book plus the father book. When you finish with your mother, your father comes next; I wrote about him in the article on the relationship with your father.
Frequently asked questions
My mother was good to me. Is there any point in working on this?
There is. Not all programs were given to you by your mother on purpose. Many you took on yourself, out of love. Unbinding doesn't judge, it just puts each thing in its place.
What do I do if I feel anger toward my mother?
That's good. Anger is a stage of healing. If you haven't felt any anger at all, maybe you rushed into forgiveness too quickly.
Do I have to work through the whole book?
No. You work with the sections that fit your experience and come back to them whenever you feel the need.
Where do I ask if I have a problem with my order?
On the contact page.
Let the inheritance stop with you
As much as our mothers could carry, they carried. What they couldn't, they passed on, from generation to generation. These unbindings stop the inheritance with you, so it no longer passes to your children. And you finally become your own biggest fan.
Step onto the salt, open the book and begin gently. Sending you a kiss, and I'll be waiting for you at the live.
I'm starting the unbindings with my mother →
The relationship with your mother: the criticism you received doesn't have to write every choice you make
In the live about cleansings related to parents, I dwell on criticism coming from the mother. At 7:14 I use the symbolic wording of giving the criticism back. In the sense of that exercise, it is a line drawn between what you heard about yourself and the way you choose to see yourself today.
Not all relationships with mothers are alike. You can keep your gratitude for some things and acknowledge that others hurt you. You don't need to turn the article into a verdict on the whole person in order to take your experience seriously.
Notice the voice you repeat in the present
Choose a recent situation: you made a mistake, you wanted to say no or you had a different preference. What sentence did you tell yourself immediately? Write down the exact words, then ask yourself whether they describe a fact or repeat a label you once heard.
“I forgot to send the message” describes a fact. “I never do anything right” turns a moment into a judgment about your whole person. You can correct a mistake without also accepting the verdict. This journaling exercise helps you separate the two.
Where care and the savior role meet
In the same live, at 2:07, I talk about trying to save your parents and repeating patterns. That's my perspective on the theme in the recording. For your life now, you can check where you freely choose to help and where you say yes only to avoid upsetting someone.
A boundary can start with your concrete availability: how much time you have, what you can offer and what you can discuss. You don't have to win an argument about the past to say you need time before giving an answer.
An exercise in three sentences
Write: “When I hear this criticism, I tell myself…”, “The facts I know are…” and “The answer I choose for myself is…”. You can keep the sheet for yourself. The goal isn't to send your mother a message right away or to obtain an acknowledgment you can't control.
Then choose a small wording that fits the situation: “I'll think about it and get back to you tomorrow”, “I'd prefer something else” or “I can continue the conversation when we speak to each other with respect”. A boundary expresses what you can accept and what you will do; it doesn't guarantee the other person's reaction.
Do I have to force closeness to feel better?
Don't demand of yourself a closeness you don't want or can't bear. In the live about the inner child, at 12:19, I also insist on closeness without forcing. You can keep this gentleness in your reflection and seek support when the theme is too heavy to carry alone.
To continue, read about the inner child, the savior role and personal boundaries. Choose the thread that best describes your current question.
